Woman Refuses Husband’s Last Name As Feminist Act, Not Because His Last Name Is Dick'ass

We want to be the first to commend Leslie, a newly engaged woman who has already declared (loudly in person and also online) that she will not be taking her husband’s last name.

“You know, I thought about it and figured, it’s 2021. I’m not a man’s goddamn property!” said Leslie. “Oh, and it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that his last name is Dick'ass, I swear."

Leslie follows in the footsteps of some of our other brave readers, brides who also chose to reject their husband’s surname. Charlie, whose husband’s last name was Manson, Bridget, whose husband’s last name was Kumrag, and Karina, whose husband’s last name was O.J. Simpson (pronounced exactly as you think it would be), all say they stand in solidarity with Leslie.

“It really is the ultimate feminist act,” said Bridget, who definitely just didn’t want to introduce herself as Mrs. Kumrag.

“I’m proud of Leslie,” said Karina. “I hope she also keeps her kids’ last names the same as hers, I mean, a bunch of little Dick'asses running around would be tough, right?”

EDIT: Since the publication of this piece, its been reported that Leslie has compromised with her husband and is now legally Leslie Dick'ass-Brown.