New CBD Oil Promises To Make Users Feel Like Everyone Is Talking About Them Without The Harmful Effects Of THC

DENVER, CO—NFT and Crypto enthusiast Conor Nathan Trunt III said in a recent press conference that his venture capital startup UnVeilant is on the cusp of developing a new class of CBD Oil. This revolutionary new product is designed to heighten the insecurity of Cannabinoids without any effect on dopamine receptors, leading to an uneasy feeling that some feel leads to productivity.

“As soon as CNT Global Management gave me the assets I just knew there was a market for my ideas,” Trunt told reporters from High Times. CNT is a private equity firm founded by Conor Nathan Trunt Sr. “UnVeilant is just another opportunity to colonize—sorry—revolutionize the Cannabis marketplace. I didn’t mean to say colonize. You didn’t write that, did you? I’m buggin’ out. Can you stop making eye contact with me for a sec?” 

No one knows if the marketplace will find a use for this product, or if it is even on the Food and Drug Administration’s radar but one thing is for certain: the marketing push is intense. Backed by CNT Global management, UnVeilant has already secured the rights to a Super Bowl Advertisement and a Billboard in Times Square.

“Do you think you are better than me? Sorry, that was aggressive," Trunt muttered to himself while pacing nervously. "Do you believe in me? I’m just spitballing ideas for the ad push. Or am I? Can you believe I can feel this good without any THC consumption? This product is amazing... Do I look high? I think I'm going to be sick.”