Male-Specializing Therapist Installs Punching Wall In Office

TAMPA, FL—Dr. Monica Rockette, a prominent therapist specializing in male patients, recently completed the construction of her newly-patented “punching wall” in her South Tampa office.

“It just became an absolutely necessary tool for my practice,” said Dr. Rockette, as she pressed a button on her desk, causing a freshly punched hole in her wall to correct itself. “See? Now, I have a nice, flat wall for my next patient.”

Dr. Rockette has made waves in the psychology community by only accepting male and male-identifying patients since the late ‘90s. Since she began, she’s had over 2000 patients and has ruined 45 offices in Hillsborough County.

“At first, I had to factor hourly wall repair into my practice’s overhead costs,” she explained. “I would never get my security deposit back. Also, spackle is pretty cheap, but it adds up really quickly when you get one or two holes punched per session.”

Eventually, Dr. Rockette simply cut out the middleman and learned how to repair the walls herself. Now, she has a growing drywall business that she operates on the side and in 2004 was awarded the Gypsum King Award by Home Depot for her speed and efficiency at patching.

Gladly, she says, her maintenance days are behind her, now that she was able to design and develop a punching wall with a team of local engineers and architects.

“It was a challenging project,” said Eustace Gobley, a mechanical engineer on the Punching Wall commission. “We had to factor in proximity of the wall to the patient’s couch, so he could easily access it when he gets called out for his toxic behavior. We had to make it feel identical to an actual wall, like one he would punch in his own bedroom or living room as their girlfriend or wife watches in horror. We even had to make it waterproof for when the patient cries against it immediately after the punching.”

“We even hosted a beer pong tournament in my office to test it’s durability,” said Dr. Rockette. “I’m proud to say to all my patients: go ahead and punch the fuck out of that wall.”