Following Covid Complications, Yankees Call-Up Promising Little League Prospect To Fill Roster Gap
BRONX, NY—Following yet another injury, and the fact that all of the team’s minor league players are currently unavailable due to Covid protocols, the New York Yankees announced they are calling up Bradley Thomas, 7, from the Scarsdale Yankees.
“Given our continued injury issues and the fact that basically, everyone in the organization has gotten Covid and, thus, can never play baseball again, I knew that I had to get creative,” remarked the team’s General Manager, Brian Cashman. “And on my drive home it just kind of hit me: there’s this huge source of talent right in my own back yard.”
Cashman spotted Thomas after he pulled over to watch a little league game near his home in the northern New York suburbs. While Cashman acknowledged his scouting report would be somewhat limited given Thomas is still too young to face live pitching, he seemed impressed, adding, “the way Bradley connected with that ball off the tee was enough for me to raise my eyebrows, that’s for sure.”
Cashman recalled Thomas’ 5-foot hit that resulted in a double as the pitcher refused to pick up the ball and make a defensive play until his coach said it was okay.
“He really tightens up the strike zone for us given his height,” remarked Yankees manager Aaron Boone. “He's a special kid for sure. He can play anywhere in the field, runs the bases with speed, and loves orange slices and Capri Sun.”
Upon learning that he would be joining a potential World Series contender, Thomas was ecstatic, although his enthusiasm was tempered after learning they were referring to a baseball series instead of a Pokemon tournament. He then threw a temper tantrum and said he wouldn’t play baseball anymore unless someone gets him the new "Mario game."
At press time, Cashman was seen drafting a fully-guaranteed $500 million ten-year contract for the prospect, but was told by Thomas’ parents he will be unable to sign the deal until the next day given it was past his bedtime.
