5 Breathing Techniques To Help Ease Your Anx—Oh, Nevermind, He Texted Back
If you’re interested in trying breathing exercises to reduce stress or anxiety—or to briefly distract yourself from checking your message notifications to see if the guy you’re kind of talking to texted back (it’s been over an hour and you’re starting to feel really weird about the last thing you just said)—here are five different techniques that should help.
Alternate Nostril Breathing. This technique is perfect for relaxation. However, if you have a cold or are congested from crying over the last five still-unanswered text messages you sent to the guy you’re seeing, consider waiting until your cold clears up, or he responds, before trying this one out (or sending a sixth text).
Lion’s Breath. It’s important to remember: breathing exercises don’t have to take a lot of time out of your day. The lion’s breath technique is a great, quick way to de-stress, center yourself, unplug from your devi—wait...oh, never mind, sorry, I thought I just heard my phone buzz. Unless...no, okay, it didn’t buzz—could’ve sworn I heard it! Anyways, yes, just unplug, take a step back for a brief moment, and stop wondering whether your sarcasm translated over text, or if you just came off really, really, inordinately mean! Make sure your mouth is wide open when you exhale—like you’re screaming.
Breath Focus Technique. Okay, my phone did buzz and it was my mom with some family emergency or something. She's so annoying. Anyway, this deep breathing technique uses imagery or focus words and phrases. You can choose to focus on a word that makes you smile, makes you feel relaxed, or makes you visibly cringe. Some words you could try out are: “peace” or “joy” or that too-long “heyyyyy” you inadvisably sent to your crush at 2:00 am last weekend. Inhale peace and joy, exhale “heyyyyy” and attempt to wipe it from your memory forever.
Diaphragmatic breathing. This type of “belly breathing” can help you utilize your diaphragm properly. Try practicing this technique for five to ten minutes, three to four times per day—roughly half the number of times you check your message notifications in any given hour. Oh, a text—nope, just an email. Leave me the fuck alone, mom! Okay, make that four to five times.
Deep breathing. Deep breathing is great for grounding yourself in the moment—ah, he responded! Wait, it’s a voice memo... does that mean I have to send a voice memo? It’s so muffled, I can’t even tell what he’s saying! Maybe he sent it by accident… But what if he didn’t? If I don’t send one back he’ll probably feel too awkward to respond again. I’ll send one back, just saying something cute and flirty, like, “Heyyyy!” That would never come back to haunt me. Yeah, that’s what I’ll do! Unless—
