No Biggie! How Growing Rappers Maintain Their Modest Size To Keep 'Lil' Name
MIAMI, FL—Fame is hard enough.
While countless musicians make sacrifices for their art, one subset of the rap community faces extra challenge keeping up with the times: those growing rappers striving to keep their family namesake “Lil” alive.
From Wayne to Baby to Uzi Vert, rappers are trying everything from scrunching themselves up like a fussy toddler, to wearing pants four times their size, fighting baby tooth and nail to remain a certified Lil.
“My dad is Master P, which means he has to be a master at everything—otherwise, he would just be P and what's dope about that?” says Lil Romeo. “He’s not even allowed to be on a specific cooking show that ends in ‘Chef.' I’m sure you can imagine what brand of credit card he’s legally required to have. I don’t have to tell you what kind of class he teaches.”
“So, I’ve learned from him that I have to be Lil’ Romeo—not just Romeo or Slightly Below Average Size Romeo—so I can keep my name," continued the bite-sized rapper. "Especially since there’s already a famous Romeo. His name is in the play. Even I can’t get enough of the tragedy about the star crossed lovers who meet their untimely death as a result of familial struggles. So If you Google "Romeo," you think you’re gonna come across me? Not on page one, bro.”
Romeo went on to provide specifics as he took his weekly measurements of himself and writing them down in his diary.
“I’ll watch a movie where they make a small actor look bigger, like Tom Cruise. I try to do the exact opposite in my music videos. Sometimes it calls for drastic measures. I got a custom made vice grip and hired a chiropractor to shove me in it once a week.”
“But it’s not all bad: I contort myself into luggage, so I basically fly for free. I still sleep in my crib so I’ve saved hundreds of dollars on buying beds. And I still get to order off the kid’s menu.”
While it appears to have some perks, staying small may be more of a burden than a blessing.
“It’s not easy; it’s one of those things you have to go at from all angles,” says Florida-born artist Lil’ Pump. “I hired a shrimp fisherman as a consultant. I figured, if shrimp can be jumbo and small, so can I. He told me to get one of those Willy Wonka hallways installed in my house so I have to crouch down all the time. Sometimes I’ll put several hard copy books on my head while I’m sitting to squish my body down. I’ll try anything.”
