5 Men From Philly You Will Date in Your 20s Who Are All Named Mike, But Pronounce it 'Moyk' For Some Reason
PHILADELPHIA, PA—The City of Brotherly Love has become a very trendy city lately, most notably because the accents are universally known to be sexy. Here’s the lowdown on all the eligible Philly bouls you’ll meet in your 20s who are probably named Mike but certainly pronounced “Moyk."
Mike D. claims to love beer, but usually just orders Miller Lite, which is not even currently recognized as beer by the FDA. He calls you “triflin’” for having an empty water bottle in your car, but loots and vandalizes his own neighborhood when his favorite sports team loses.
Mike L. never leaves his block, even though his ankle bracelet came off months ago. He's very passionate about Eminem. Do not bring up Eminem around him. Trust me.
Mike P. is an Italian boul who still lives very much in his childhood home. His family calls him “Mikey” and they don’t think you’re good enough for him. He has less than zero jobs if you can believe it.
Mike J. is from the neighborhood of Tacony, which is pronounced “Taikoohwney.” A self-proclaimed child genius, his first words at age one were reportedly: "back door, dickhead”.
Mike C. is someone you meet at NYU. He tells everyone he’s from Philly, but he’s actually from the Main Line. You still do coke with him even though he is a liar.
