Dang, Maybe Next Time! Comedian You Hooked Up With Didn't Roast You In His Set

NEW YORK CITY—Local woman, Lexie Bottom, was shocked and dismayed to find out the comedian, Ronald X, she made out with last weekend had not dissed her in their set.

"I just expected a lot from the experience," said Bottom, lightly crying. "I actively made some weird noises during sex, like some snorting, and I was so drunk I wouldn't shut up about how my ex hated grocery shopping with me. Those were gold for comedians, and when I went to his set to stalk him, he didn't mention anything about the hookup."

When reached for comment, Ronald X said, "Who is Lexie? Wait, did she have red hair, right?"

A local audience member from Ronald's show at The Chuckle House, a local comedy venue/mafia front in Queens, said, "Ronald's set drew a lot from his father issues, and he did once mention his ex having cankles, but nothing about a recent hookup from last weekend. I do remember that at one point, a heckler screamed, 'We made love last weekend. Don't you have anything to say about that?' That was a little odd."

But do not worry, Bottom has made lemons from lemonade with a viral tweet talking about the shock and shame she felt from having an awkward sexual experience and not being roasted onstage. She's in talks with a publisher to turn her tweet into a feminist book about one woman who is silenced because a comedian didn't recount her sexual fails.