New Taco Bell Ad Depicts Conquistadors Ravaging New World in Search Of Fabled 'City Of Nacho Fries'

CHICAGO, IL—Fast food mega-chain Taco Bell has released an ad campaign depicting conquistadors ravaging the New World in search of a fabled “City of Nacho Fries,” according to a press release.

“This is an exciting new day for Taco Bell and its parent company, Yum! Brands,” said Taco Bell public representative Glenn Gellar. “This innovative ad campaign continues the narrative-driven, edgy marketing the Bell is known for. From that time we did a dystopian future thing or the “Fry Force” one that I guess was like anime or something? Anyway, this one is about a group of Europeans coming to the Americas and completely destroying everything in their path in search of our delicious, spicy nacho cheese. It’s good fun!”

Natasha Roth, a longtime Taco Bell customer, was unsure about the new direction.

“I saw this weird ad for Taco Bell,” Roth said while eating the limited-time-only Hispaniolirrito Burrito. “It had like, a Spanish clown in old-time armor call himself “Hernan McCortés” and slaughter a village of indigenous peoples while looking for “El Nachoado.” Which, I guess is like “El Dorado,” but with nacho cheese instead of gold? Honestly, it was confusing and upsetting.”

“This is good, though,” Roth said, finishing her food. “Like, I could probably eat one more before I have to go to the bathroom."

Dr. Martha Carter, a behavioral psychologist, says the darkness of Taco Bell’s new campaign is key to its success.

“Advertising like this touches something sinister and frightening in the human spirit,” Dr. Carter said. “We are both afraid and titillated to confront the atrocities of the past, and those intense feelings are easily transferred to the delicious, price-conscious offerings of Taco Bell. Not to mention, nacho fries just fucking kick ass.”

As of press time, Taco Bell was releasing a second commercial in which the Nacho Emperor was strangled to death before having his delicious, cheesy innards eaten.