You Gotta Be Bad, You Gotta Be Bold: Top 5 Des’ree Songs To Have Boring Sex To
Fall has already passed and the grip of Winter has already come through, It feels necessary to set up y’all FLEXX readers with some helpful—if not patronizing—sex advice.
Now before you just straight-up start slapping grocery bags worth of genitals around, you have to set the mood: candles, whips, chains, an RBG poster above your bed, an actual, yet optional, headboard (fellas do not feel pressured here. Being a scum bag is still totally acceptable). And the most important mood setter of them all? Music.
The sex you’re bringing is most definitely boring (you're reading this article, after all), but that’s ok! If you’re over 30, having boring sex will come naturally. The novelty of sex has worn off and feeling good just doesn’t seem that productive anymore.
I totally understand. To be honest, I listen to Tracey Chapman when I wanna fuck real hard and cool, but this isn’t about me. It’s about you and your tedious bedroom tactics!
So what’re you going to do? How will you overcome to cum? Do you really wanna try going with your “Songz 2 Bo!nk 2” playlist again?
If not, let me introduce you to the most exciting yet tiresome artist since Boy George: Des’ree.
Describing listening to Des’ree is like describing group sex with only plush toys: never thought you’d find yourself in this situation but pleasantly surprised with how comfortable you feel. Here are the top 5 Des’ree songs to have you in the bedroom thinking, “Goddamnit, I could be responding to that email right now. This is such a waste of time!”
“You Gotta Be” is her most popular song to date, so that’s a must on the playlist. Put this on during the end credits of your fuck session.
“Feel So High” is a song that makes you wanna look up in your partner's eyes when giving head, and give them a wink and a thumbs up. Talking dirty is for stupid people.
“I’m Kissing You” will make you second guess having sex to adult contemporary hits real quick.
“Like a Pimp” by David Banner. I need a switch up, I'm sorry.
“Bia Bia” by Lil John & The East Side Boyz. Sorry, this is way more fun.
I just want to state as well, if Des’ree isn’t for you, I totally understand. I only listen to an exclusive playlist of nothing but Lloyd Banks, Lil’ Flip, and Chingy when I’m trying to boring-stroke. To each their own! Find out what works for you.
