Second Sexual Predator On Supreme Court Just Happy He's Not The Black One

Second Sexual Predator On Supreme Court Just Happy He's Not The Black One

After being confirmed to the Supreme Court by one of the slimmest margins in American history, sexual predator Brett M. Kavanaugh expressed concerns with the women shouting “Shame!” outside the proceedings, but stated that it could be worse.

“In the end, at least I’m still white,” said Kavanaugh after chugging a beer. “I can’t imagine going through this as a black man.”

When asked about Kavanaugh’s remarks, Clarence Thomas declined to comment, which was no surprise to Kavanaugh.

“He historically doesn’t talk much since he’s been on the bench,” said Kavanaugh lifting weights with his friend, Tobin. “Anita Hill ruined his reputation forever. That, and saying he was the size of a can of coke didn’t help either.”

Clarence Thomas went over 10 years without asking a question from the bench of the U.S. Supreme Court, only recently asking a question in February after the death of Antonin Scalia. Kavanaugh has no plans to remain quiet.

Said Kavanaugh, “I’m white, so people want to hear what I have to say.”

President Trump agreed with Kavanaugh’s assessment.

“He’s totally brilliant, and also white,” said President Trump, “which gives him an edge over Clarence Thomas. White guys like Brett Kavanaugh deserve due process and black guys like Clarence Thomas or the Central Park Five are naturally guilty.”

Kavanaugh, Trump, and Tobin then gave each other a high-five at the same time.

“We call that the Devil’s Triangle,” added Kavanaugh.

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