Planned Parenthood Elects Asian Woman As New President So A Bitch Can Cut The Damn Line

This week, Planned Parenthood elected their new President—Dr. Leana Wen, an Asian American physician who most recently served as Health Commissioner of Baltimore City.

Dr. Wen, an immigrant who left China with her parents when she was eight years old, represents a shift in leadership at Planned Parenthood—Wen grew up in poverty in Compton, CA and relied on Medicaid and Planned Parenthood herself growing up. Finally, a fellow Asian woman in charge of Planned Parenthood who actually represents its patients—now can a bitch cut the damn line?

Planned Parenthood’s abundance of reproductive health services makes it an irreplaceable resource, especially for low-income women of color like myself. With Dr. Wen as the new president, I’m really looking forward to using our shared experiences as poor Asian women to guilt her into letting me cut this godforsaken line. I been waiting in the damn line since 3:00 am—yesterday morning. I also had an appointment for next month, which I made while Obama was still president, but they had the audacity to reschedule it to Q2 of 2020. I’ve had this UTI for two years now and I might have been pregnant at some point. I have questions, and I need answers while I am still alive.

I am very excited to see a woman of color lead one of the biggest nonprofit health organizations, and I am ready to cut these other hoes in line. Asians thot too and since ya girl has been thotting hard this summer, mamma needs to check that none of her organs are missing. Dr. Wen, this is my plea for you to put the “action” in Affirmative Action. If not, put the white lady back in charge so I at least don’t feel bad for smacking a bitch after 37 hours in the waiting room.