7 Dogs Named After Black Artists, Ranked By The Unbearable Whiteness Of Their Owners

7 Dogs Named After Black Artists, Ranked By The Unbearable Whiteness Of Their Owners

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Dog: DMX, Alaskan Husky

Owner: Scott Adams Collins, Democratic Socialist 

Scott is happy to talk your ear off about why Martin Luther King would be a member of the DSA but is suddenly busy during at all the Black Lives Matter marches.

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Dog: Queen Bey, Akita

Owner: Heather Casbeer, Urban Farmer

Heather would give her kidney to help Beyoncé, but wouldn't lift a finger to help literally any other black woman.

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Dog: Drizzy, Shiba Inu

Owner: Lisa Broder, Climbs rocks for “fun”

Lisa never fails mention how “Drake is the only black guy” she would ever date.

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Dog: Migos, Pitbull-Lab Mix

Owner: Emma Owens, Vassar College Graduate

Emma likes the song “Bad and Boujee” but has not made eye contact with a black person in 14 months.

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Dog: Nicki Minaj, Basset Hound

Owner: Meredith "Meri" Filder, Bike Shop Owner

To her credit, Meri can recite the words to all of Nicki Minaj's catalogue. Unfortunately, she also uses the n-word while singing along.

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Dog: Common, Pug

Owner: Kaitlyn Snodgrass, Vegan-Cupcake Shop Owner

Kaitlyn she loves the movie “Friday” but calls the cops on the “threatening-looking” black men on her stoop.

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Dog: J.Cole, Schnauzer

Owner: Garreth Lorimer, Political Science/Business Double Major

Garreth is in everyone’s mentions about J.Cole went Double Platinum with no features, but voted for Trump because he couldn’t sus out Bengazi.

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